Like 'his own kid'

Michael Casagrande

Nov. 1, 2009 (McClatchy-Tribune Regional News delivered by Newstex) -- TUSCALOOSA -- Empty cabinets filled the sparsely decorated California home of Glen Coffee

There was a bed, Xbox and the couch that Gary Cramer recently called home for a few nights.

It's not the life expected of the San Francisco 49ers' third-round draft pick, who recently signed a seven-figure contract. But it's the reality Cramer wants to help Coffee through.

As the campus director of The University of Alabama's Fellowship of Christian Athletes and part-time life coach, Cramer took a few days out of his schedule recently to spend a few days on the couch of the ex-Tide star he considers "his own kid." The two communicate several times a week, mostly by text message.

When Cramer sensed homesickness was settling in for the Florida native living way out on the West Coast, he jumped on a plane.

Why? It's just what buddies do when one needs a hand.

Coffee, who led all NFL backs with 249 preseason yards, is learning just how different the pros are from college. It's much more of a business where the individuals are fighting for roster spots and a paycheck. Cramer is there to help him through that transition.

To Cramer, Coffee is more than a multi-million dollar investment or an insurance policy if 49ers starting running back Frank Gore goes down to injury because "the person is so much higher than the game."

"We want them to know they are non-negotiable," said Cramer, who came to Alabama in 2006. "Because if you don't know you're non-negotiable, the league will eat you up."

That unconditional support separates Cramer from the hangers-on. It breaks down the wall between the 47-year-old from rural Pennsylvania and the star athletes he counsels.

"A lot of people that they call friends, but they're more acquaintances," Coffee said. "But Coach Cramer -- he's someone I consider a true friend. So having him out here felt good."

And when he got there and saw the cabinets were bare and refrigerator empty, Cramer pulled out his considerably lighter wallet to fill both with the necessities.

It's just one of the unofficial duties of the man known around Alabama athletics as Coach Cramer.

Back in Tuscaloosa, Cramer's schedule is packed. He is found at any number of practices and on the sidelines of Bryant-Denny Stadium on game day.

He's essentially a coach without a clipboard who trains the soul instead of the body. From the starting quarterback to the bullpen catcher, everyone is treated the same and the religious teachings are not forced upon anyone.

A true buddy doesn't read your stat line.

Nick Saban was at Alabama about nine months when he sent then-defensive coordinator Kevin Steele down to fetch Cramer for a chat. Saban welcomed an increased presence of the FCA around the program, and the director was more than happy to lend a hand.

That was about the time Cramer's friendship developed with Coffee. They've been close ever since.

So when Cramer sensed the fairytale life of an NFL rookie wasn't exactly the reality, he bought a plane ticket and flew west.

"Life in the NFL is very routine, and you find yourself bored a lot of the time when in college there are a lot of things going on," Coffee said. "You have class. You have practice. There is always something going on. But in the NFL, it's work. And when you go home, it's like, 'What do I do now?' "

While in California, the two ate together, bowled and went to the movies. They never played the sport Cramer is best known for, pingpong. The doubles partner of Julio Jones keeps paddles in his pickup truck and possesses enough talent to intimidate even Coffee.

"He'd try to beat up on me," Coffee said with a chuckle.

As a father of three, Cramer has two sons playing college athletics. His oldest son, also named Gary, is a catcher for the Samford baseball team, and Robby Cramer's role as a freshman starting long snapper at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Va., means missing Alabama football games when they conflict.

The extra attention he directed Coffee's direction is only what he would hope someone would show his children if they needed it.

His full-service, yet complimentary assistance included setting Coffee up with Jim Stump -- the Gary Cramer at nearby Stanford University and former chaplin of the 49ers -- in case a long-distance phone call can't solve a problem.

As a 39-year veteran of working with student-athletes in a similar capacity, Stump said Cramer's willingness to spend his own money to travel so far is hardly common.

"He's like I am, we both survive as non-profits on donations from people," Stump said. "So it's not like we're making a ton of money."

The entire $300,000 budget for FCA at Alabama -- including the salaries and benefits for the small staff -- comes from charitable gifts.

Coffee is not the only former Alabama star who remains on Cramer's radar and text-messaging circle.

An average of 70 to 75 text messages come and go from his iPhone from 9 a.m. to 1:30 a.m. every day from the likes of Antoine Caldwell and Rashad Johnson as well as current Alabama athletes.

A buddy is always available.

Senior offensive lineman Drew Davis is one of the current Tide football players who works with Cramer. He even did pre-marriage counseling with the FCA leader who can relate with even if he'll never match his pingpong skills.

"He ties it in with the sports aspect," Davis said, "Because he is such a competitor and he loves to win."

Cramer and the FCA also step in when life is not so giving.

When the older brother of Alabama defensive lineman Kerry Murphy was slain in August and the family didn't have the money to cover funeral costs, the group stepped in. Cramer, whose oldest son played high school football with Kerry Murphy at Hoover High, had to call the NCAA to make sure donations wouldn't violate rules.

There was also the matter of helping the 6-foot-5, 315-pound lineman deal with the shock of his loss.

"We get to see the side of life that the 92,000 on Saturday never think about," Cramer said.

Even when the topic isn't coping with tragedy, the conversations Cramer has with the athletes sometimes reach deep into their personal lives.

For the pros, finances are fair game.

From average college students to sudden millionaires, the jump can be a shock to the system.

"I'm not their agent," Cramer said. "I'm not getting paid to do this. I have no agenda except to see them succeed in life."

The three-year plan Cramer has for each of the NFL rookies includes attending their weddings. In 15 years, he wants to watch their children's junior high football games.

"And 20 years from now, I want their kids to look back and say 'My dad is the most amazing dad,' " Cramer said. "That's my goal."

Before any of that, however, Cramer keeps an eye on the here and now. Whether it's by text message or house call, he's always available for the humans behind the helmets and facemasks.

Sometimes that means sleeping on the couch of an NFL running back who could use a spiritual boost.

And when that star athlete's cabinets are bare, Cramer fills them without hesitation.

That is, of course, just what buddies do.

Newstex ID: KRTB-0047-39342254